Serve your kids' interests - Part 2

In a posh Manhattan high rise, I once interviewed for a nanny job. While I respected my interviewer's rags to riches story, looking back I take deference to why he was hiring a nanny. The nanny job (requiring a college degree) was not only to tutor the children in their schoolwork, but to serve as an advocate for their advanced development as individuals. In other words, if a child wanted to be on the football team, take saxophone lessons, be on the debate team, take 4-H, be a student senator, and climb Mt. McKinley, it was the nanny’s job to see that it happened---all within the child’s short adolescent life. As there were several children in the home, this would be, for certain, a massive undertaking. I actually think it would have been a fun job, but I don’t think kids need to be involved in everything (unless they are extraordinary---and most are not) to find what they like in life. In fact, I think that giving kids a healthy dose of down time is extremely desirable.

When I was in High School I would arise at 5:30 a.m. to go running. Regardless of snow, heat, rain, it didn't matter; I went running. Then I joined the swim team. That meant rising at 4:30 a.m. so I could have a dark-of-the-morning run and catch the early bus for swim practice. Sometimes I stayed up until 2:00 a.m. doing homework. I remember falling asleep in Chemistry class---and probably many others. I look back on that time as being unnecessarily burdensome. Through that and other long-term experiences with over doing it, I have come to believe that many times less is more. I am happy to give full devotion to one or two primary interests for each child, but beyond that it is superfluous. The good thing is that because I'm not hauling them off to multitudinous, useless practices, they actually have time to develop independent interests, many of which they can do right at home or nearby.

Kids need to be kids. Families need time together---at home, in a positive environment. This is rarer all the time, but is vital for health and wellness. What is not needed is a frenzied, artificial existent consisting of clubs, activities, awards and achievements. Moderation is key in a healthy life and a child's development. Serve your kids' interests. But keep a balance.